Excerpt for Mozek: The Forbidden Knowledge #3 by , available in its entirety at Smashwords

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Kiki Kay Lee

Cover art by: MaKayla Beineke

Mozek: The Forbidden Knowledge




Fire and Ice


Within shards of glass were two men, shivering to the bone. It would take some time until they froze to death, but at least they would freeze with each other. The older man’s shaky hands shook with an abundant amount of speed as he gently caressed his companion.

In reaction to Carver’s attempt of brushing the younger ones bangs out of the way, Trevor sniffled. Both of the male’s eyes began to drip with an orange hot liquid. This liquid (known on Jantung as “api”) began to crystallize into translucent teal glass over one another’s eyes.

As their body began to exhaust such a substantial amount of body temperature, their muscles tensed in everlasting pause. The two men latched onto each other in order to not be separated. The bodies of these two lovers crystallized in teal glass, the shards breaking such unique auras.

Carver and Trevor’s existence dissipated into nothingness whilst gazing sincerely upon another. Afterlife death was not a myth, for it has been done. Jantung had killed such history of these to as if they never existed in the first place.

Kanoa and Kalani were vastly separated in complete darkness. Under the clear ground, they could not see or understand anything. It was as if they were merely existing, yet not comprehending the small stimulation they were given. It was enervating to have no thoughts, no feelings, no knowledge, and no apprehension.

This is was deadly, but not deadly enough to end such royalties life. For this, was the ultimate punishment for the people who most crave knowledge of the unknown. They did not deserve such knowledge, due to the fact that they were attracted to this in the beginning of time.





Forsaken Alliance

Daren was not expecting to tolerate such scorching pain from a planet with a frostbitten atmosphere. It felt as if his skin became more elastic whilst it melted into hot wax. His lungs were filled with a dry and sandy smoke. It became relatively complicated for him to breathe.

This man was dead set on the belief that people in afterlife cannot die. That would be impossible! Though, he feels he just may prove himself wrong. Ashes of his red aura lit in gushing streams of wet fire. It exhilarated those that had lit it.


The 32 year-old’s tears refused to flow from the dry steam emitting the area. What kept him company was the light. The light of the fire seemed to promise that it wasn’t the end, because once the end starts the end can never began again. The light united with the crazed man and began to sing for him.

He was the only one that could hear the light pitter-patter of the voice, yet he knew that it belonged. The truth seeped out of the window and into his soul. His aura began to burn with the same texture and color of the strong fire. The riddles it sang were enticing.

The fire told him that he could escape as long as he had the confidence to do so. Boy, did that man have confidence. He was an arrogant egoist! Though, he did not feel as such today. Daren had confidence that he was going to die...in the afterlife.

As the fire pleaded with him, confidence tardily grew within his heart. His heart had beat along side the rhythm of his own flickering aura. It was much more brighter than it’s ever been!

His patience lasted a short while until he had followed the fire’s precise instructions. The male focused in closely to the color of his aura as he counted each time it flashed. 1...2...3...4...5..6...7... The man counted until he reached seventy-two. It was now or never.





The 32 year old blasted the fire with dramatic force until it burnt no more. His aura shined the same color and texture that the fire once did. This man was proud of what he accomplished. He overseen his pain and lucidly threw his powers into the air.

Blooming Radiation

Earthquakes ruptured. Volcanoes erupted. The skies glowed pitch black. Lightning cracked the sky. Tornadoes swarm into the wooden fields.

As the ground rumbled with disgust, Daren danced in glee for what he had just done. He had used all the strength in his ability to escape and he had succeeded. It felt as if the fire had swaddled around his heart. This had in turn gave the man drive of what had to be done.

All of Jantung became clouded with ammonia and plutonium. The walls of the planet began to shrink. As each person of the Jantung tribe freed into outer space, Daren knew he had to save the others
fast.

A eerily distant call did not phase the others, for they cannot hear. With an substantial amount of confidence, it was no luck. If only he had Kalani’s ability right now. He would be able to see where his friends were located.

Daren’s blunt confidence slowly dripped outward. At lost for guidance, he pleaded with the fire within him. “Please, I must save them! I could never live without them...I don’t know where-”

The man’s chest began to burn as his adrenalin began to quake with overwhelming knowledge. This knowledge was infused within his brain by the magic fire. He would thank such a spirit, later.

He was told exactly where each person was and how to get there. When the 32 year-old dove into the ground, he soon found Kalani and Kanoa staring blankly at him. The forces of another earthquake rupture the two free from the translucent ground.




Crazed Lunatic

All had to began to recover rather quickly from such trauma. Trevor and Carver’s souls were dramatically in-bedded in their clear bodies. Kanoa and Kalani were raged with obscene anger at what had just happened. Though, Sarah is still stuck with The Penguasa.

The group made their way to The Penguasa’s temple. It was large and had seemed to infinitely pierce the blood-orange sky. The texture of such a prominent building was laced with a delicate form of rainbow crystals.

Mozek had tread within the arched doors. What was awaiting for them on the other side was dementedly unbelievable. Daren’s once proud heart debauched, nowhere to be seen again. As his skin crawled with absolute disgust, he charged to the two.

Carver, Trevor, Kanoa, and Kalani watched intently with distant incertitude. The two females were
kissing quite contently. It was as if Sarah or Penguasa did not notice them barge in.

“What the
fuck do you think you’re doing with my girlfriend!?” The aggravated male securely grasped Sarah’s shoulders unlatching her connection with the other. His eyes glazed over with discernible betrayal.

His wife locked her dazed eyes with the other. As Daren teared up, he realized that he had lost his one true love to the hands of insanity. Oddly, Penguassa grinned with praise for the other. “ You do love her. I know that she does not love you. At least, not in the sense of romance.”

Daren gritted his broken teeth, earning himself a subtle snicker from the female with purple hair. “That’s not true! You had no right force such things on this innocent girl. You...you should be ashamed of yourself for what you have done!”

Penguasa sniffled sincerely. “ No, I have known her far longer than you have. We use to be friends on Earth, until you came along and took her from me. This is why I despise you so!”





Betrayal



What do you mean!? Who are you?” When Daren began to question such things to the woman, she became increasingly disturbed. Her anger corroding her true temptations.“You never met me; however I had a romantic relationship with my love, Sarah. It was only rational to take the advantage of you intruding my home. I want to make you suffer from what you had done!”

Her eyes began to radiate with tinged guilt as Daren smelled of confusion. “I think you have the wrong person. Sarah would never date a girl. She’s completely
straight.

The man soon felt more calm as his bewilderment of the situation overwritten his insecurities. Kanoa froze up, but proceeded with caution. “Listen, it’s not Daren’s fault. If you two were intimate before, what happened?”

The Penguasa mumbled incoherently. “My dad made me move when I was 16 due to this relationship. Though, we still kept it strong. It was a secret. Our parents would accept such a thing. Years had passed by until I found out that she had gotten married. It was devastating to feel such betrayal and guilt. You don’t even understand the half of it...”

Agnes poured her heart out, letting all riddles bleed out. She became progressively thirsty, her tongue dry with loss of words. Silence drained the feeling of all those that suffered in the palace.

“If you love her, wouldn’t you let her be happy?” Trevor was the first to break the silence with such a urgent question. “Listen, all I know is she’s mine and you cannot have her back. That is final.”










Arrival of a Queen


It was set in stone that the woman would not hand over the innocent girl. As Sarah came to, she rose her voice, expelling aggressiveness. “Aggy! Why would you do this!? You know good and well happened. You know I felt guilt for what a horrible thing I did to you. I’m sorry, but you can’t hurt these people. They have done nothing to you! I have.”

“No! Sarah, don’t!” It was true that she heard the others pleas on attempting to make her stop with such a compromising decision. “I would love to be your queen; however you must let them go back to Mozek. I will stay here with you, so long as you do so.”

Daren felt his head ache with tremendous convulsions. His wife is gone...He’ll never find her again. He knew that it was her only sacrifice to safe her friends, but it was just to risky for her.

Sarah Reed had always put herself in someone else’s shoes. This girl was always ready to put other’s comfort in front of hers. This lady was a true angel.

The Penguasa kneeled down, as she held the other’s soft hand in her own. It felt right. It felt wrong. It was a mutual love. She had two loves and she was forced to pick between.

It was brutal and tortuous, but if this is what she had to do to save the sanity of Mozek, she would do so. Daren had left in swarming tears, while the rest followed awkwardly behind.


Sarah watched intently as her former husband vanished in red smoke. It was saddening to see, but perhaps he’ll be happier without her causing him trouble. With only, Sarah and Agnes occupying the whole planet, it would be anything but lonely.





Her long lost friend was her first lover. She loved Daren, but not in the way he thought. Daren was her best friend that she only agreed to marry, so her parents would not accept something else. This would either be the beginning of a nightmare or the beginning of a blissful daydream.


Lost Love



A lonely man stands on a fiery cloud, awaiting his lost happiness. He had just lost his best friend whom he had loved dearly. It was his final and most prominent wish that he would bring her back.

Daren refused to see Agnes as a decent human being. It was only natural to feel impulsive hatred toward someone whom had known what a lost love would feel like. What selfishness she displayed!

The 32 year-old kicked, igniting persuasive flames. Fire was his only friend at the moment. This may be so, for quite a while.

Maybe he could confide in his brother? Wow, what a sheepish thought that is! He doesn’t know why, but his brother always despised him.

Ever since Daren had accidentally killed the two of them, his brother would barely talk to him. What made him so angry? It was because of the fact that Carver had lost his love.

The realization was completely dreadful. This must have been karma for what a hideous thing he did to his brother. Though it was not on purpose, it still had dawn an aggressively remorseful feeling upon himself.










It was known that Daren had met Sarah in the afterlife. It hasn’t been so long that he had been engaged with her. The traditions were rushed in order for everyone to feel a sense of completion.

There was still a lot he hadn’t known about the gorgeous ginger. That is: what she fears most, events she favors, and even her favorite animal. All this time, he had been so selfish.

The personality traits of the 32 year old consisted of the man being arrogant and snobbish. Though deep within his soul, this just wasn’t so. This was a defensive instinct from the brutal harassments in grade school.

A trail of fire lit the path as Daren made his way to his brother’s Zalee. This was the only thing he knew to cope. The man with pitch-black hair needed someone or
something. It was always so hard to achieve his goals and arrive at his destinations.


Technical Difficulties



“I’m sorry that this has happened. I’m just not the right person to talk to about this.” Carver’s hand fumbled with a Styrofoam magazine. Both brothers sat awkwardly beside one another in the confined Zalee.

Daren pleaded with a shaky and desperate tone. “Please broyo. I don’t know who else to go to. I don’t do good at coping as easily as you did with Tyrone.”

The 21 year-old with blue irises was clearly aggravated as he began to sweat profusely on his forehead. “For the last time, Daren. His name is Trevor. Why can’t you get that through your thick ass skull!?”



Daren was emotionally struck from such a assertive yell from the other. Tears dared to escape his withered eyelids. “Why...Why are you so mad at me anymore?! You know I felt guilt for what I’ve done to you, but that is no reas-”

Go! Just leave. You wouldn’t even listen to my advice anyway. You’re such a stuck up-augh!”

The younger of two was unmistakably interrupted with an obnoxious hug from his brother. “I said; I’m sorry. Please just forgive me. I can’t go back and change it. If I could, I would.”


Carver’s eyes began to drain of a hot and unfamiliar liquid. He knew it was tears, though he hadn’t felt them in so long. He was known to control his sadness by transitioning it into anger.

As the 21 year-old’s hands shook into a mold of the hug, he began to stutter inconsistently. “I-It’s...okay. I’m sorry too. I acted like a fool. I just can’t stop thinking about what could have been. Trevor would still be alive if I would have been there to protect him.”

It was silent as both brother’s smiled warmly upon one another. Their faces were severely redden with sour tears. “So, you forgive me?”

It was quite an obvious answer to the question, though Carver answered anyway. “Yes. I can assure you that you’ll get Sarah back eventually. She stayed in order for us to be freed.”

”She’ll never come back. She is in love with that girl and I can’t compete with that. She was never in love with me. She felt bad, so she became mine. Though, she isn’t mine anymore.”


Abstract Distractions


”Maybe...Uh, I don’t know. I told you that I’m not really good at advice.” The 21 year old bit his lip harshly. This was such a delicate subject to talk about to his older brother.

“Nonsense, broyo! You’re boy talks a lot about you. He’s told me-” Carver’s face grew red with intense exasperation. “What do you mean he talks a lot about me!? When are you two ever
together?”


Daren was slightly taken aback by such random behaviour coming from the other. “We’re friends. I call him by the wrong name just to make you irritated. It’s hilarious to see! Why are you so angry about that?”

The younger of two scoffed as he crossed his arms in wrath. “I just don’t want you two together... You’re a bad influence on him.”

The other man dramatically rolled his caramel- colored eyes and mirrored his brother. “Hey now, let’s not get like this. He likes to talk to me about things he’d rather not talk to you about. I came here to talk about my problems, so lets do this, hm?”

Carver was not having any of this rude and immature behavior he always expects from the man. “Why don’t you just go talk with your new best friend then,
hm?” The 21 year-old was evidently offended by this and Daren had no clue as to why.

“Wow,
Carly. You’re such an obsessive creep. You must be in some deep lust with him. Like dude; what the fuck? He can’t have his own friends!? Don’t you think you’re being an a little too obsessive?”




Daren would call him by the name of Carly just to be a smart ass. The younger man lost it as he swiftly pushed his brother out of his Zalee. His hostility spoke for him.


Carver’s sibling had lost his chances. He was done speaking to the dark-humorous man. The Indonesian was constantly reminded just why he had labeled the other as an enemy.


It was now believed that the 32 year-old got what he deserved. It only made sense to let the man burn in his own personal hell. Daren Hadi was the only reason that Carver Hadi’s life was legitimately ruined.



If it wasn’t for him, Trevor would have never have to go through this. The young man would still be happy and would have a bright future ahead of him. Now, nothing has been the same since.


Nonsensical Emergencies


Trevor gasped with elation of the situation. Daren had came to him for advice. This guy never asked for anyone else’s opinions, especially advice.

“If she really does love you, she’ll come around. I hate to say this, but maybe she just likes you as a friend. I mean- y-you only knew each other for less then year...it’s possible-”


The older man was severely offended. No one seemed to take his problem seriously! “Wow! You’re just like Carver. I should of known you know nothing of love...”


It was the 32 year-old’s way of tricking the other to be on his side. He surely knew the young man would be debilitated by such a obscene statement. As Trevor prominently became angrily flustered, Daren snickered with cruel joy.


“Of course I do! Why would you say something like that?” This conversation soon became an argumentative competition.

“Why so defensive? It must be true...” The sing-song voice of the other male made Trevor leaped onto the other as goosebumps filled with wrath.


The brunette’s hand’s shook as he gripped tightly onto the other’s collar. “I know plenty! I’m just saying that things happen for a reason. God, you can be so annoying!”




Daren grinned widely down upon the other and scuffled Trevor’s thick hair. “You’re so cute when you’re angry. I can see why my broyo is in lust with you!”

The younger man abruptly became physically nauseous from such a disgusting message. The 19 year-old huffed in silence as he deliberately crossed his arm in annoyance. “So, are you going to accept my advice? I think you just need to go with the flow and everything will work out soon. Besides, if it’s not true love, then it will never happen. You just have to accept that and move on.”

The older male nodded and proceeded to give his friend a fist-bump. “Thanks, Trev. I know I can count on you.”


Clumsy Lavender


Back on Jantung, Agnes and Sarah lain in silence. It was not a ungainly occurrence, for it felt so correct. The scent of Lavender drifted slowly as it tickled. the ginger’s nose.

The walls of the palace were painted with a dark shade of emerald whilst the floor wore a delicate maroon. These two colors seemed to fit perfectly in synchronization together.


Where did the dark go? It felt so light here. The feelings of the serene atmosphere shook the 25 year-old’s heart. Realization dawned on her that she had broken one of the most important vows with Daren.

“In the name of The Holy Spirit, I Sarah Reed, take you, Daren Hadi, to be my husband, to have and to hold from this day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, until we are parted by death. This is my Solemn Vow.”





Her eyes glazed over with silky tears. She missed him deeply and truly. Though, in the back of her mind, she lied in such a vow. Sarah made her self believe that she was being honest, bu it couldn’t be further from the truth.


The older female with emerald hair and irises to match noticed her lovers sudden depression at that moment. Her thin and lanky fingers were ice cold upon the other as she petted red hair. “Honey, what is the matter?”


The question seemed innocent enough. Agnes pretty much took her away from her formal life, well...afterlife. It was brutal and she knew deep within her brain that the girl didn’t mean to act so violent. It was all done in the name of love. Jealousy just didn’t seem to fit her sweet and kind best friend.


As Sarah’s eyes overflowed with anchored tears, she began to confide in her past lover. “I know you meant well, but it was not right to treat Daren that way. A-And...I...I...know what I did to you. I didn’t mean to do such an awful thing. I beg for your forgiveness. I wish that-”

The 27 year-old gave a slight smile as she continued to pet the soft hair of her companion. “Sweetheart. I promise you that he’ll be okay. Trust me. We don’t have to worry about what other people think of us now, because we’re dead. It just doesn’t matter anymore.”


Everything that came out of Agnes’ mouth rose a spark of calmness within Sarah. A serenity that was uniquely tied down to the two of them. It was known in the back of her mind, that Daren was not handling this well, but all that seemed to matter right now was Aggy.







Seventy-Two Square M.


72 Years passed with Daren still at a very low point in his life. People whom had tried to help him regain his pride were unwelcome by a sorceress of depression. It soon became too much to conceal.

A definite answer of, “No, It could have been...” arose on his mind daily by the minute. A horrifying glimpse into what hell is on heaven poked a knife into his back.


Every 72 years was a mark of something great to be done. Though for Daren, it was the exact opposite. The birthday celebration of Mozek would not be the same with the only person that lingered emotions of an undo-able kind. Today would not be like any other day.

The date of 72
M would mark the brilliant achievement that Kanoa placed on a forbidden topic. Mozek held anonymous opinions of the graceful dedication of the afterlife. This date symbolizes extraordinarily arrangements of happiness.

This is why this holiday must be celebrated in an Earth simulation in order to bring about good memories from past lives. Oh, what a joy that is! If only Daren could celebrate the first holiday with contentment.


Every inhabitant on Mozek had the right to choose where they would like to go within the Earth simulation. Trevor chose the most favorable thing he has always wanted to do, go to an arcade! Carver had followed along his friend’s choice.


Kalani sincerely wanted to be around her new friends, so she also went to the arcade. Trevor made sure he would pull a grumpy man in on the fun. Even though the 32 year-old was obnoxiously repelled of the thought of not being around his best friend, he sucked it up and went along.




Motivated Astronomy

Many people played individual games at the mimic of an Earth’s arcade. Trevor grunted as he rammed the joystick of the game, knocking down his virtual opponent. It was all very comical to the 21 year-old.


The male relaxed his palms into his black jean pockets. It was an amazing feeling to see his love sincerely happy. He really didn’t care about his brother right now. Why would he? Daren never cared about him.

“Wow! Did you see that!? Did you see that!?” The brunette male exclaimed, initiating a fit of elastic giggles from his close friend. This must be what an utopia is.

Daren hovered over the angry Kalani. He stared intensely as she yelled such foul obscurities at the machine. It was surprising just how feisty a little girl could be.

The 32 year-old huffed in silence. He thought he had friends, back up to make him feel better. The truth is, he doesn’t. “Hey, Ka..lan...i...?”

The girl with high-held brunette pigtails jumped up and down as she defeated the game. “What do
you want?” Daren rolled his eyes at such devious attitude.

“Simmer down, girly. Just was going to ask you what brought you here. I mean, why are you dead?” It was a rather forward question, but he had to take his mind off of his problems somehow.

“None of your fucking beeswax, you dicko!” The female’s behavior rang the most annoying tune in the adult’s eardrums. “You’re pointless.”

As the man began to walk away, he was abruptly pulled off to a scarce and dark side of the arcade by no other than Kalani, herself. “Listen. Dude. I got some secrets. You want to know them or are you too big of a pussy?”


This was absolutely shocking to hear such words come from the child. What did she mean, “secrets”? What would that have to do anything with him?


I..I want know them.” This was all that could be uttered by the male. Lately, he hadn’t felt like his self. This just about proves his odd mood.

“I have the secrets of the unknown. When I get reincarnated, I’ll tell the world about them. But, for now, I will tell you.”

Secrets of the unknown. Why would this trigger such explicit curiosity in the grown man? Obviously, he knew much more of the unknown than her. She’s merely a child.

Detrimental Cycle

Kalani O’kusky sees the world in a different view than anybody else sees it. Why stop at learning about the world when you can learn even more about the multiverse? It was sure that her God mother knew these things, but she dared to never speak of them.

This 13 year-old is different, for it is her goal to teach everyone the dark truth. That is, death is only rebirth. It’s a cycle that spins on and on. A cycle that no one can escape from.

What if one was to break the gnawing chains of this cycle? What would happen if all was nothing and nothing was all? These human emotions won’t matter once you die.

Emotions are just that, nothing that will accomplish anything. These are parasites that hold you down. Is there actual life out of such agonizing emotions? If so, how can we get rid of this?

The truth is, this universe or any other universe does
not exist. We don’t exist. Yet we are here. Yet we are not here. Sure, it is confusing and that’s a perfect example of an emotion tying you down to not knowing the unknown.


We will never know what we want to know if we let our emotions control everything we think and do. It is correct that death answers absolutely nothing. You will not know any information of the unknown if you still let your emotions attach onto you.


It is what makes us humans. Though, we are not real. Humans is merely a false title we put to ourselves in our false existence that we pretend is the definite reality. There shall come a day or a plane of acknowledgment that we realize that our tragedies in life will not come to haunt us if we don’t want it to.


The truth is in someone’s mind. The truth of the unknown is now revealed. The truth is that our existence is mere residue of brain tissues and receptors within a mind of another “human”. This “human” wants to know of the unknown. If only he knew, he is the unknown.


Forbidden Knowledge

It was a lot to take in. It was a lot to breathe out. All this information shook his head into an everlasting whirlpool of desire.

Daren knew much more than he was born to know. He knows the unknown. How valuable and precious it is to know such knowledge.


It is excessively horrifying to understand that he is in someone’s brain. All of Mozek, Earth, Jantung, and any other planet or universe resides within another human’s brain.


“You...can’t be serious, right?” The brunette girl grinned widely and nodded with intense enthusiasm. “Oh, but I am! I know much more than this. Consider the fact, I was in that foreign world in my first life.”

This had to be a lie. It had to be made up. Could he believe such a child? He didn’t even know her well, though it seemed as if he had connected to her right then and there.

“What...What do we do with this? Does Carver, Kanoa, and Trevor know?” A blatant stare was received by the other. “Of course not! They’re to dumb to accept much facts! Kanoa does know. I thought you were ready, so I told you. Don’t even dare take this as a compliment.”




Kalani gave Daren a intimidating glare with a hint of demand. The Indonesian was in complete and utter disbelief. The man was pounded down everyday by his brother telling him how immature he is.

Wouldn’t you know it? Karma does come and it comes with a sensitive satisfaction. He wanted to know more. What was this “human” like? Are we merely thoughts or characters in some kid’s brain?



All of the man’s anxiety about losing his love soon drifted into a locked abyss, never to be thought about again. Perhaps the master of all their existence’s would take matters into his own hands. Maybe the saying is true. Everything happens for a reason.



If Only

A male with brunette hair is feeling rather impulsive today. This boy is 19 years-old with a a tendency to be deathly quiet. Even though, he prefers to use his small voice for important things it is still known that he physically acts out of this portion.

Any day like this wouldn’t be well understood to an untrained eye, however, a skilled professional could tell you what exactly is this person’s intentions. The young man has such a large quantity of thoughts in his head. So much so, that it may collapse his brain one day.

The brunette sits on a wooden chair, barely stable. While doing algebra on a scuffed paper, he holds his breath as someone slides by. Another man with the most appealing shade of black hair and blue eyes is oblivious to his surroundings.








Nothing in his life has made him feel in such a foreign way. The 19 year-old feels insanely guilty for these intense emotions that he holds for a stranger. It is only necessary to ignore such thoughts and feelings.


There are so many possibilities as to what can happen in his brain. The young man can almost fulfill all of his staggering emotions, though, they could never possibly happen in real life. This is why he must use such an impressive power!


All that he has ever wanted to do, was experience something friendly. Someone whom is kind, to tell him he is wanted. Perhaps that person is exactly in his presence.


The kid knows all too well that he was cursed with bad luck at a young age. No one would be willing to care about him. If only, he could be in control of how things go in life. If only.

Starry Night

He always goes unnoticed, though somehow, today is different. What has changed such misfortune so quickly? Did he even deserve it? Perhaps, it is due to the stars.

The 19 year-old watches the older male’s clothes wrinkle as he sits beside him. The twinkle in his eye warns him that he should make no moves until it’s time. The man with charcoal hair parts his plump lips to speak.

The brunette’s spine impulsively tingles accordingly to the deep pitch of the other man’s echoing voice. “Hey, I’ve seen you in here quite a bit and realized we haven’t formerly met. My name’s Carver.”








The younger boy bends his brows as he swiftly shakes the outgoing hands of his peer. His heart patters lightly with a twitch in his tongue. It was difficult to speak, yet it was well worth it, because this moment is precious.

“H-H-Hey, Car...ver? I’m T-Trevor. N-Nice...to m-meet...you.”

Carver snickers softly at the small and shy tone of the other. He calmly pats on the teen’s right shoulder. “So, did you drop out, Trevor?” The brunette forcefully bit his lip as he shriveled up words to say.

“U-Uh...m Yeah, I-I...Yes. Did you?” The 21-year old quickly shook his head to respond. “No, I’m actually a tutor here.”

It was true that Trevor was desperately searching for phrases to say. Even though he has made up a million scenarios in his head of what could happen and what should be said over the years, he had forgotten at the most prominent time of his life. “Oh.”

The 19 year-old had grind his teeth together for saying only one meaningless word. It was soon accepted that the bad luck curse had caught it’s prey. “Well, you seem cool. Do you like pizza?”

What an odd thing to ask. “No. I mean- I never ...I n-never had it. W-W-Why?” Trevor anxiously cursed his annoying fluency disorder. It made him out to look like a pure idiot.

“Oh man, that’s unheard of! You’d probably like it. Would you want to come with me on Friday to that pizza place on Main St? We can get to know each other.”

How did that happen so easily? There is a god out there that is helping him out. Why would anybody want to spend time with him?

Trevor had to constantly remind himself that it would not be a date. That is completely absurd. That fantasy would only apply to the world he has created in his head over the years called Mozek.



Mozek Vs. Earth

As Trevor lain in his tattered bed at the foster home, he stares off into space. Within space, anything could happen. If only it was like that on Earth.

He envies the people whom would never wish for a better life than this. The 19 year-old is sick of pretending. He wishes everyday that he soon can join Mozek. Though, it doesn’t even exist but in his head.

The life he favors is torn in half by the angst of reality. All of his friends in Mozek would surely agree that he is welcomed there. Trevor is kept under surveillance due to 72 suicide attempts in the past.

To be unchained from the laws of gravity is all he ever wanted. To not feel such immense pain, to feel wanted, to be cared about is such a far-fetched dream. Carver was just that, a dream.

An angel that he did not deserve would be here for him shortly. But for now, his deep sleep filled with short-lived dreams called him towards. He had no intention to sleep, but it came so easily right now.

The time is 6:32 P.M. A knock on the teenager’s door alerted him out his dream cycle. His hair thrown upon his face soaked up his hot sweats. The brunette’s eyelids struggled to lift.

“Yes?” On the other side of the door stood Sarah, his caretaker. The girl had a surreal kindness that tickled the male’s cheeks. “Someone is here for you. Were you expecting-”

Trevor’s eyelids jumped open. How could he forget his date! No, it’s not a date! “Yes! U-Uh...Sorry! I-I-’m going to...T-Thanks.”

The 19 year-old leaped into the driveway to find a 5’7’’ man. His hair was heavily groomed and his skin bronze. Carver smiled warmly upon the disheveled man.

“Did you forget,
Trevor?” The sound of the younger male’s name sent chills up the brunette’s spine. His face was painted with a crystal clear shade of crimson.




Y-Yes.. I..mean..I-I..mean..U-uh...” The height difference was soon noticed when the older male shuffled the greasy hair of the younger male. “It’s fine. You ready?” Trevor have never felt less ready in his life.


When they arrived at the restaurant, it was abruptly recognized that Trevor had no money to pay. He had forgotten everything recently! His face grew hot with extreme embarrassment. How would he tell him?

Both stayed seated at the table. Across from one another, Carver was the first to speak. “So, you never ate pizza, huh?” The younger one violently shook his head.

“Well, let’s change that. Are you vegan or vegetarian?” Trevor was panicking at this moment. Everything was just so dreamlike and blatantly intense. Could he be dreaming?”

“I...uh...N-No. I don’t...I d-don’t eat...m-m-meat. Sorry.” The brunette wished he could automatically stop stuttering, though it seems to get worse when he’s scared or nervous. That time would be now.

“Oh, no worries. What about cheese? You like that?” The 19 year-old nodded with blushed cheeks.


Once, they did obtain some pizza from the restaurant, the younger of two started to search for absent utensils. Carver chuckled abundantly. “No, no, no. You pick it up and eat it. You’re so funny.”

The brunette’s heart dropped that he had
already made a mistake. “O-O-O-Oh...” The younger male did as so, then paused before he took a bite and looked up to the other for approval. The taller of two grinned as he nodded before taking a bite of his own slice of pizza. “So, are you from here?”











Unsolved Fiction

This is Trevor Dane Fredrick’s actual life. In his mind, things are different, they are just the way he wants them to be. Sure, it’s like a story. When things go wrong in his life, he’ll use his mind to comfort. If he is angry, he’ll take it out on a character in his head.

There is no harm in this habit, right? It’s not like he is actually hurting people. They are all fake. These people are all made up.

If only it was true, if only Carver was his to keep. He does know, that all good will come to an end. This will happen a lot faster than one might think.

His head spins with memories of his former abuse before he was put in a foster home. The anxiety trickles down his skulls and pulsates through his limbs. He wishes he could forget, but he remember so vividly of what happened.

Why does life have to be such a way? What is the point of life if there is only nonexistent happiness? What would it be like to feel such a thing?

Trevor’s only hope relies within his new friend, Carver. Everything about him makes the brunette’s heart race. Why did he feel such an inappropriate feelings towards a man?

Why couldn’t he fall for a girl? It’d be much easier than this. Though he knows it is profane , he cannot halt the strong feelings that come with this.

On any day like this, he’d go out for a walk. Something pulls him down. A large weight of grimy and irritating darkness latches on to him. He knows this feeling all too well. Depression.







In Trevor’s world called Mozek, he names this obtrusive disease “The Deast”, because the presence is like a devil and a beast. It holds onto you for all eternity, quickly sucking your identity out of you. Deast is the worst to be around.



The brunette wants to know what it feels like for it to not follow him, though he probably will never know. It is unknown. In times like this, the boy will drift in outer space. The place within his mind will put an end to the violent tendencies that The Deast would soon provoke him to do.


Mozek is a place of true nirvana. The happiness that surrounds this planet is infinite. Many of his friends there understand him. They surely love him.

Sarah, Daren, Kanoa, Kalani, and his favorite person of them all...
Carver. Trevor’s face heats up as he remembers the things he had done with the man. This makes him truly guilty and ashamed to envision, but it is very exhilarating to imagine such complex events.




The 19 year-old’s head rests on his white pillow as he gently closes his swollen eyelids. Soon, he will be visiting Mozek and all the wonders that come with it. Soon he will be able to touch and feel his friend, his companion, his
lover.


Secrets Exposed

“So, the day is free. What would you like to do?” This will be the time that Trevor does the unthinkable.

The younger male’s face lights up as he grins loudly up at the other. “I want to ask you something, but you have to promise not to get weird-ed out. Alright? “



The two both lain in a zalee embracing one another. The male with charcoal-coloured hair brought out a confounded expression. “What is it, dear?”

The 19-year old tried his best not to melt from the husky voice emitted from his friend. “Uhm..I don’t really know how to go about this. Well, I’ll just say it right out; you’re not real.”

Carver’s smile dropped completely as he sat up abruptly. “What do you mean? I’m right here. This is the afterlife. Are...you feeling okay, dear?”

Trevor grunted as he laced his arms together. “You said you wouldn't get weird-ed out! I want to tell you the truth, but I want you to be open to it.”


The 21 year-old gave a slow and unsure nod as he patted the his companion on the right shoulder. “I’m not making fun of you. I just want to know where this is suddenly coming from.”

The younger of the two huffed, his face still fiery hot with dreaded embarrassment. “It’s coming from my head. I’m not dead, not yet, anyway. I wanted you to know I made this all up. I’m still alive on Earth. I was going through some troubles and...I...well...this is what made me feel-”

“Trevor! What are you talking about? I thought you came out of this...
psychosis. I love you, dear and I just want you to feel better. Because, all I ever see is your sickness and I just want to see you.

The brunette’s eyes teared up obnoxiously. Anger ran through his veins. He knew he could control Carver. This was all in his thoughts. But, why does it seem like this man always has a voice of his own. It was as if this is in Carver’s head too.


“ What the actual
fuck!? I’m not sick! I’m perfectly fine. Why...how come...you...don’t believe me?’





Unexpectedly, Carver dove in for a delicate kiss before being aggressively shoved back. Trevor would of never thought he’d say these words. “Don’t kiss me! Answer.


I-I-I- don’t know what to say. We need to stop lying to each other. The truth is, I do believe you. I already...knew. Because, well, I do the same thing too.”

Trevor’s eyelids widened with pure electric shock. “Wait, what do you mean you know and do the same thing!? What are you trying to tell me?”

The younger of the two never seen his friend look so shy at this moment in time. It was as if he was
...scared. “I mean...I know this is your world and I’m sorry that I violated it. I just wanted to know what you thought about.…”


His heart jumped to the bottom of his body as he gasped for air. The boy’s lungs began to fail him by hyperventilating. “You mean...Y-You don’t mean...that...this is...in your head too, do you? Am I r-r-r-really talking to...”

An echoing gulp was lifted out of 19 year-old. Carver nodded with unknown tendencies. The broken light began to piece and soon came a large amount of gratitude.

All of his questions has been answered. All that he ever wanted to know was right there in front of him. Magic is real. Dreams come true. There
is a reason to be alive.


Awakened Symmetry



Trevor awoke quickly due to his alarming dream. There was no possible way that it was true! Nothing aligned up symmetrically. It has to be just a dream.



The teenager looked down at his bed sheets to see a puddle of sweat. It was time he go take a shower and try to forget everything that had just happened. It seemed as if everything was too good to be true.

The steaming water trickled down the male’s chin as he clenched his eyelids shut. How could Carver even attempt to explore his brain? That’s insane, it’s impossible!


It made sense, it didn’t make sense. This is the most confused he’s ever been. The brunette fiercely bit his bottom lip, breaking the skin. What has he become? Why does he feel such intense relief?


Is Carver even real? Could he still be dreaming? There was so many questions and not enough had been answered. He desperately needed to find out more about this situation.


But how? That’s it! Dreaming, that’s all he really could do anyway. There was no way he could talk to the guy in person anyway, he’d surely be locked up!

Later that day, Trevor arrived at his classes and was excited to be receiving a new tutor today. His last one moved away and barely even spoke English.

The 19 year-old was severely astonished to find out that Carver was indeed his tutor. How come after years of bad luck, he is now receiving the best of luck? The brunette was abruptly jolted away from his pondering questions swirling around his brain.


“So, looks like I’m your new tutor, huh? It’s nice to see you again, Trevor.” The taller man’s insanely attractive smile punched the younger of the two right in the heart.

Every time his green-yellow eyes were met with cobalt blue, it ignited something in the pit of his stomach. It’s was painful, though addicting to feel such a thing. As he broke the long eye-contact, he whimpered.




Y-Y-Yeah. You...t-too.” The older male opened up a language textbook and pointed to a set of sentences. “Can you read this out loud for me?”

“T-T-T-The grey...s-sheep...r-r-ran...u-uhm...a-a-across t-t-the...m-meadow...a-and...d-d-d-dashed tow..a-ards...a..it’s.…u-uhm...parents...”


Trevor really wanted to crawl under a hole at this point in time. It was so embarrassing to talk and he had no control over his wavering voice. His new friend must think he is complete idiot.

Though what was unexpected from the older male was a pat on his back. “You did good. I want to help you find your voice. I think you have a potential to be a public speaker, even though you may not think so.”

The brunette stared the other straight in the eye. “Y-You...c-c-can’t be...ser..ious...” Carver grinned proudly. “You have a potential to do anything you want to do in your life. I have confidence in you, but the person missing the key of confidence is you,
dear.”

What the literal fuck did this guy just say!? He called him, “dear”. He doesn’t even know him! Only Carver calls him....Oh my God.

“W-W-W-Why.. did...y-y-you...y-y-you...just c-c-call me...” The man with charcoal hair had shot his eyes wide open at the realization of what he had just done.

“No, no, no. I’m sorry...I didn’t mean to-” The taller of the two rested his vision toward the ground in utter humility. Trevor grew vicious by the moment. He needed answers
now.

P-please...t-t-tell me...it’s n-n-not...t-t-t-true. G-G-G-Goddamit!!”

The older of two became increasingly worried for his friend. “Don’t be mad. It’s okay. You don’t have to talk. I-I’m sorry that I’ve done this. I just wanted to know what you thought about m-”



Trevor was experiencing rapid deja vu all over again. “Y-Y-Y...w-w-what...a-a-a-are y-you...t-t-telling.…m-m-me!?”

Carver crunched his face. “Don’t be mad at me, dea-. I’m sorry. I just wanted to help you out.”

The brunette grunted, feeling unpleasantly ill. He felt violated, to say the least. He knows for a fact that he must be dreaming right now. “A-A-Answer...m-my q-q-question, Car...v-v-er!”

The 21 year-old rubbed his temples as he let out a hitched sigh. “I did it. I know about your world of Mozek. I know everything there is to know about you. I...I am telepathic. I just want you to know, I meant no harm. I just wanted to understand you better, because I care about you. I’m telling you I’ve been with you through your adventures in you head. It’s not fake, it’s real. The people there have feelings and...I’m just so sorry. I messed up. I’m sorry.”

The 19 year-old could of sworn he saw a tear released from the other, but it must of been his imagination. This man isn’t known to cry too often. Everything was way too much to take in..


As he felt an instant headache appear, he began to whisper in order to control his voice. “P-P-P-Please just t-tell me...y-y-you don’t r-r-remember t-t-t-that t-t-time w-we...” His question was soon answered with a hesitant nod from the other.

“O-O-Oh m-m-m-my G-G-God!” Carver swiftly shook his head. “No, no, no! Don’t get upset, please! I wouldn’t have let you if I didn’t want to.”


Everything is expensive. The time is expensive. Life is expensive. Love is expensive. When will anything be free to keep?






What more is there to know? Plenty questions will arise soon, but what’s the rush to know the answer to them? There is nothing impossible. This is a figment of human’s imagination. Everything is possible.



Negative Awareness

Look at your surroundings. You do realize that you don’t even understand the half of it. The lightning strikes you down, just to lift you up again.


Rainbows and four leaf clovers disappear and reappear everyday. Have you noticed this? Maybe you should take your time to try to understand the world for what it is rather than for what it is not. Dream in color, but don’t sleep all day. Daydream and awaken your senses to the world unknown. There will come a day when you understand everything, yet you won’t be satisfied because you do.


When there is nothing to learn, what would be the point? Discover a range of sensations, some you may never no existed. Walk the 4
th dimension and don’t turn back. Go further into the future and the past.


No boundaries are sculpted here, only risks you can’t forget. It is the time and it will always be the right time to try something new. You can go backwards, forwards, or stay put.

It’s okay if you’re afraid, just know that each of us has a few angels, that only wish for you to conquer your problems. Dedicate yourself to the forbidden road. Walk it. Never look back. Because if you do, you won’t go forward and that’s all any of us really wanted to do.


It’s up to you, it’s not up to me or anybody else. It’s all up to you. You can control everything from the stars in space to smallest insecurities within yourself. You’re brain is a world. You’re heart is a world.



Do with it what you will, but there will come a day when you’ll have to enter another world. One you have no clue about. Disguise yourself as a confident person. Don’t hold your true self in, be open.

What surrounds us here, won’t surround us tomorrow. Know the truth and use it wisely. This will come in handy if you really crave the day to know the unknown. I begging you to let go of everything. Forget your fears, they never helped you. Forget all the bad memories, even though you’ve learnt from them. Whatever you do, don’t forget who you are. If you’re still lonely, there is plenty of people to communicate within your brain, you’re world. It’s all up to you.


Forgetful dream

What was he to do with this knowledge? He needed to know more. It was always more that he needed and never less. Daren noticed Kalani walking the false trail of the dimmed light park.

The male dashed up to her, earning him a punch in the rib cage. “What the hell do you think your doing, dummy!? Are you trying to scare me? ‘Cause that’s a dead end road for you.”


Shit. This girl was a handful to deal with. “No, I just wanted to ask you some questions about, uhm...what you were talking about at the arcade.” The young female puffed her cheeks in a sarcastic grin.

“What makes you think you deserve to know more?” That phrase extremely agitated the man. It was time to stop playing foolish games. “Listen, if we exist only in a dude or dudette’s brain, what’s the point? Why are we even here?”

The child grunted as she quickly crossed her arms. “You can’t just get information out of me, you have to earn it first!” Why is it so hard to get through any girl’s mind?





Hold the fucking phone. How come you seem to know everything?” He knew he really shouldn’t be cussing to a 13 year-old, but hell, she already does the same.

“I already told you, I know the guy. I use to live on Earth.” This child had to be a pathological liar! “If you supposedly do, what’s his name?” Kalani hesitated for a second before she gave an unsure sigh.

“His name is Trevor. We are in his mind. We exist on Earth still. It will start to make sense soon, but don’t wear yourself out. You look beat to me.”

These words would forever rot in his mind. Against all of the forces of inactive nothingness, he shrieked up at the lying sky. “Are you telling me I don’t exist? It doesn’t even add up. I remember life on Earth. Let’s cut the shit, girl. You’re wrong.”

Stupid people with their small little brains. No one seems to open to new ideas. They barely even think. Humans are just zombies wasting away.

Kalani wanted to break this guy’s teeth more than anytime before. He has no right to question her knowledge. The brunette with pigtails jammed her index finger to the man’s chest.

“I told you, you weren’t ready to learn the unknown. Not until you’re mature enough to realize that the world doesn’t revolve around you!”

Everything this girl said was shockingly true, but Daren would never admit this fact. She did know. It was time that maybe he should change for the better.

This life, afterlife, or whatever it is gave him a lesson to transition into a personality that understood logic. All his narcissistic ways would be a thing of the past. Maybe it’s time he looked at the bigger picture.


To be continued…


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